The importance of maternal mental health

As we mark Maternal Mental Health Month, it’s important to spotlight a topic still overlooked amidst the chaos of new motherhood: the importance of maternal mental health. For mothers in what feels like the eye of the storm, safeguarding their mental well-being is a priority, not only for themselves but also for their little ones.

First and foremost, let’s talk about a common misconception: the postpartum period doesn’t merely last a few weeks. In reality, it extends far beyond, encompassing a spectrum of emotions and adjustments that can persist for months, even years. During this transition, many mothers experience what’s often termed as the ‘baby blues’ – a rollercoaster of emotions attributed to the hormonal upheaval as the body readjusts post-delivery. It’s essential to acknowledge that feeling tearful, overwhelmed, or anxious during this phase is completely normal.

However, it’s equally important to recognise when these emotions go beyond the ‘ordinary’. When intrusive thoughts, overwhelming anxiety, extreme anger or a sense of detachment (or even over-attachment) from your baby begin to dominate daily life, it may signal a deeper issue. This could manifest as postpartum depression, a condition affecting around 1 in 10 new mothers, or in more severe cases, postpartum psychosis. There are many different levels of maternal mental health support in Dubai, and I have a network of professionals that I often signpost mothers to. Sleep coaching can only 'fix' so much, sometimes extra support is needed.

As primary caregivers, mothers often find themselves struggling with a million emotions, from the primeval urge to protect and care for their offspring to the overwhelming responsibility that comes with it. Evolution and biology have wired maternal brains (or main carer brains) differently, priming them to be hyper-aware and sensitive to their infants' needs. However, this heightened awareness can sometimes tip into anxiety or obsessive thoughts, especially for those prone to perfectionism or control. This is obviously not helped by the lack of sleep, or worries over breastfeeding- a common worry that I see as a lactation consultant in Dubai is that baby isn't getting enough milk.

It's important to know that seeking help is not a sign of weakness but bravery and love for yourself and your child. From therapy and support groups to medication and lifestyle changes, numerous support exists to aid maternal mental health. Additionally, involving partners in the care of baby can take off some of the pressure from mothers and create stronger familial bonds. Sometimes, just sharing your feelings is the first step to lightening the load and lessening your anxiety. Some families prefer practical help, such as a lactation consultant, or a sleep coach for a sleep training programme, or a meal delivery service just to take that pressure off. Find what works for you and meets your family's needs.

Speaking of partners, let’s not forget the importance of their mental health. While birth mothers are recognised in discussions surrounding postpartum struggles, partners too can experience a range of emotions – from joy and fulfilment to anxiety and uncertainty. The weight of responsibility for this new family can lie heavily on their shoulders. So whilst the biological and chemistry factors are not there- the mind, as we know, can play tricks on us and lead us down dark paths. Encouraging open communication and shared responsibilities can go a long way in easing the transition to parenthood for both parents. And not just in the postpartum/breastfeeding phase, but throughout your parenting journey. In my sleep coaching sessions, I encourage parents to have time set aside, once a week. It doesn’t need to be lengthy, but it should be a protected time, where you speak to each other about what’s gone well that week, what hasn’t, and what you could do differently to ease the load a little. As a children’s nurse, sleep coach and lactation consultant, I do this regularly professionally, and personally within my own family.

In some cases, traumatic birth experiences can leave lasting emotional scars on maternal mental health, leading to conditions such as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). I've seen this a lot through my years of neonatal and paediatric nursing, and it has a bigger impact than parents realise when they store their experience in Pandora's box and 'move on'. Recognising the signs of birth trauma and seeking professional help is important for healing and moving forward. A cup of tea and a biscuit can solve many things, and whilst it may be the catalyst for you to open up to someone about your feelings, sadly it most likely can’t help you work through them in the way you need. It’s a good place to start though.

As you find your way into parenthood, let’s prioritise not just the physical well-being of mothers but maternal mental health as well. By creating a supportive environment that encourages open chat, compassion and empathy, we can empower mothers to embrace the journey of motherhood with strength, resilience, and grace. Remember that village everyone always talks about and we wonder where ours is? We need to create it. It may be the mum you meet at baby sensory class, or the family doctor you feel just ‘gets you’, or your nanny, or the mum you randomly get talking to at Softplay, or the lactation consultant you stumble across during a 3am Google session….they will be your village.

Caring for maternal mental health is an indispensable part of that village, and people will show up for you in many different ways.

Always look for the helpers.

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